O Godot, Godot! Wherefore art thou, Godot?

I cannot explain what has been going on these days because I've been waiting for Godot... That's right... No idea why, but I feel that Godot will come soon.

Then again, if Godot ever comes, will I be prepared for it embrace it with my heart or will it be a blunt disappointment?

Sometimes anticipation drains one of enthusiasm.

I know I'm seemingly cryptic here, but hey... it's how my mind is working right now.

And it sucks.

See, everytime I type, the elaborations in each sentence are omitted. I think in phrases. Words.
Barely sentences...

Heck, I even think in punctuations. The most common ones are "???" and "?"
Occasionally "!" pops up in my head and when I try to think, my mind goes "... ..."

What more a story?

I can only wonder what's in store for me.

It's 0435h now and I still can't sleep because I need doughnuts for my soul. Blame KakLong for posting a picture of a boxful of glazed (and probably stuffed cream!!!) doughnuts. I'll probably try to queue hours for doughnuts tomorrow then. But they only sell by the box, and I'm not sure if I can afford it. Well... See how la.

A Child Called 'It"

I cried... Real tear-jerker. I didn't expect that to happen to me, not while doing what I love doing - reading. So, yeah, you can check it out. It was riveting and compelling. I wonder how anyone could do that.

A Child Called 'It'
by Dave Pelzer

Have I mentioned that it's based on the author's life?! This book isn't mere fiction but I was hoping it was when I read it.

P/S: Foung this link while searching. You may read snippets of what's to come.

Regards to all :-)

Cheap shot

So, yeah... the poll is a cheap shot at attention... and humour. Ahaha... Because I am so lame. But I'm just curious cos I cannot tahan pedas. Also, at the time I requested a poll recommendation, I had some funky idea, and by the time I could do the poll, it flew off my mind.

Smile and participate before it gets replaced by something more serious. As for the forehead issue, not enough response man... I prolly gotta go over there with my measuring tape and a chart.

You know something, I think I am queer. I've been told so, and I feel so. Sometimes, difference is a novelty... sometimes, it ostracises you. Oh well... whatever makes me happy. Now, let me share with everyone my 2 pet causes. I'm not Miss Earth, I know... but I have pet causes ok. People think it's weird. Some get shocked. But hey... a little sharing goes a long way.

1) AIDS is so scary... but it's increasing in statistics. And it doesn't help in education because to discuss it is taboo. Seriously. I'm sure, even if we meet, we're not going to talk about it face to face. I guess behind the screen is always easier to speak of something so heretic to society. See, my pet cause is to be protected. It's that simple to keep AIDS at bay. Buying the condom shouldn't be too embarrasing or difficult for anyone who decides to have some 'responsibility'. It is almost safe against diseases and unplanned pregnancies. With proper knowledge of its appropriate usage, we can beat the statistics and save babies born with the disease. But then... some argue about religion getting in the way of the condom. If they're gonna have pre/ extra marital sex anyway, still think about the sperms dying meh?

Anyway, out of the millions of sperms produced by the male at any one time (assuming ideal conditions), only ONE will fertilise the egg and the rest will die. So talk about the condom suffocating millions of sperm? I think saving ONE life is better than saving ONE sperm.

Also, all women should undergo a HIV test before planning a family. I'm sure we all trust the man we're gonna wed eventually... but sometimes, you'll just never know. And the lifelong suffering that comes along with it is gonna be way too heavy to accept.

Ok, that was long... but I already curbed myself from going into details. And it is difficult for Muslims to talk about sex. I'm talking about societal issues and the fate of the world!

2) Saving the Earth. I mean, within our means. How many of you have got a closet filled with plastic bags??? See, what we can do is simple. Carry washable shopping bags. They look so unfashionable but let's not risk the Earth's life further. Be it your mama shop, your Ah Boon store or the hypermarket, bring your shopping bag. It's a cloth bag that you can stuff into your glove box, or your trunk, or even your pocket! Ladies, if you can hold your wallet and handphone in your palm, why not carry this nicely folded shopping bag? Do not ask for more plastic bags than needed. You don't need it eventhough it's free.

Sometimes, we have to make a conscientious effort. So, before I go into details about how the Earth is ailing, let me conclude my 2 pet causes. I share it if I can. Sometimes it gets weird, but I know that people do listen.

With knowledge, people can make calculated choices.
Everyone deserves to choose life.

Polls

Do you know how to create polls on blogger? Is it possible? Or are there some funky widgets out there that enables poll creation? It'd be fun.

:)

Yes, it's now 0621h! I welcome Mondays with a smile.

Incredible!

Incredibly lazy, that is... in updating this blog.

Nothing much to write.

Though I might confess soon.

Aiyah... too many things ricocheting in this head of mine.
Do you know I've a very broad forehead?
Speaking of which, can I do a poll of those of you* who also have one mighty broad jendul?
Please reply in comments. (can also provide info for those* who have it, but don't come in here)

See, I always digress.

Oh ya, for those* who wants their confidentiality kept (for the jendul matter), please email me.

P/S:
Afifah - I passed 3 books to your mom, I think.
1) The Rule of Four
2) Like a Flowing River
3) Blood and Gold
I recommend you read (3), and (2) is easily readable... nice to share. Your mom took it cos you know, she knows you adore Coelho too. Finish up (3) soon so by the time you come here, you can bury your face in my Anne Rice section. To know what else to read, go to my LIBRARYTHING link on the left. It's as much I've managed to catalogue.

Mak Jang - Happy Birthday!
Had I known, it was, well, your birthday... when you came, I would've baked something. You know, I need an opportunity to exercise my interest. I call it an interest, not hobby. Cos I do it oh so seldom-ly. Yes, occasional is the word. And thanks for bringing me around the hospitals. It was interesting and insightful. Plus I get to observe the different local characters. Come again soon!

The 3 girls - Re: SPM results
I already know... Please share how to get countless 'A's. It's already very very very good... I mean very very very very good! And Jana... 12 As?!!!

As always. I'm such a geek.
Thank God I look otherwise (although it has its pros and cons).

Ok, I will write soon.
I promise.

In the meanwhile, please please update me on your* (and the rest's) foreheads.
*Only blood relations applicable.

Peace.

Thoughts...

It's 0242h and I need to sleep... but what I just did was crunched my way through a whole bag of keropok ikan! You know... the jumbo pack type! Hold on, let me check - 200g! Yeah, start shaking your head. I'm shaking mine too... while tsk-ing.

Can't sleep. Suddenly, I feel my mind at a juncture I can't point a finger at. You know, we are all realists, cos idealism always seem so far. Yet something just clicked in me, that I'm moving on into idealism while being a realist. Is this trouble?

I mean, it's possible to have such a balance, isn't it?

I'm not beating myself up over it, but I just feel like something is just off-balance inside and outside, it's seemingly smooth. Is this the calm before the storm? Or am I already in the eye?

Please enlighten the young one.

(And no, you can't have the keropoks just because I might have tempted you. It's nasty, really... after a big bag. Now just let me down it with some Pepsi...)

I kid you not. :-(

What's so wrong?

Over the long CNY weekend, there was a whole selection of movies to watch, offered by the various channels. Being me, I turned to the unusual, which is to tune in to the malay channel, Suria. Festivities drive me crazy. The least I need is for the main channels to run noisy adverts. Anyway, I watched 4 movies overall! (Which is quite an achievement actually... in malay some more!) The winners were:

1) Trauma
2) Sepet
3) Ungu Violet (indon)
4) Gubra

I thought the directors for all these 4 were amazing... either that, or I didn't realise how much I've missed out from malay films.

Trauma was almost a perfect thriller cos the director was subtle in letting us in on the schemes... until he/she did frequent flashbacks during its peak. Bummer.

Sepet was very sweet. Funny in parts. Significant in today's society as well. I don't understand how it is a taboo to date another race. If there's one thing I hate in this world, it is discrimination. And hypocrisy. Ok, that's two things... but aren't we all generations borne out of different cultures and races? But the ending... aiyah... it was so predictable but since it was such a sweet movie, I half expected a happily-ever-after ending.

Ungu Violet is another sweet movie. Towards the end, you thought it's going to be a predictable tear jerker... But hey... love makes the world go round. Isn't ungu violet in malay?

Then finally, Gubra. It's a sequel to Sepet. I thought it didn't cover much on Orked's life (I need the dots joined from that Sepet ending!) cos it made me focus more on the other story going on at the kampung. That, I don't know how real... but it is, however, crucial in educating the viewers. That disease which is so unmentionable it becomes forsaken... forgotten... all because of ignorance and weakness. I think it's a good movie but I read reviews which said that it should be banned! What? Any movie that educates should never be banned. Taboos are meant to be discussed... especially if it becomes one. Anyway, violence isn't glorified here at all... unlike most mainstream movies.

It feels so good to watch malay movies once in a while. =)
Except that I understand by reading the subtitles. =(

Notices due

Notice 1:
Apologies for irregular updates;
for keeping out of touch with some people, even when I know I should

Notice 2:
I'm not inspired enough to write

Notice 3:
Congratulations to Uncle ****** (daddy's only brother) for ... you know... should it be classified info? (But already a very public figure huh?)

Notice 4:
Tok Bang, I hope your eye op is a success.

Notice 5:
Afiqah and Aqela, you must be waiting for results right? Is Aqela in the blog circle? (if not, rope her in!) Well, Afiqah, it's cool that you're volunteering with the zoo! I so wanted to do that you know... Not the most glamourous of jobs, veterinary is, but you know what is rewarding. Don't think about the fact that veterinary is probably the toughest course ever! =) Read up more, volunteer and get more experience.

Notice 6 is a reminder:
Everyday I hear the rustle of the leaves as the wind blows... even if it's a slight rustle, I hear it calling to me... Sometimes, it sounds like laughter, like a tribal dance celebrating life.. sometimes they pour out their hearts telling me how everyone walks past it without acknowledging them. Suddenly the rustling seems to me as though it has its arms flailing frantically, shouting, "Hello! Hello! I'm here, do you see me?" (we all CAN see, but DO we see?)

You know I keep reminding everyone, don't forget the trees, the leaves... the very essence that creates the webs of life. What is the use? I don't know... When I have the urge to share it, I will. Maybe it annoys you, maybe it puts a smile on your face. We never forget God... yet sometimes we overlook the important manifestations of life. It never fails to intrigue me and make me wonder. I'm sure Tok Kamil will understand what I mean. He is after all, the "rambling man who rambles what he wonders". Maybe I can't put my thoughts into palatable sentences (yet?). I begin with baby steps, talking about the trees who love us so. I hope that one day, I can join the dots. Till then, bear with the incoherent thoughts. I'm sorry I cannot always put a point across, sharp but sweet.

Until I find the intermediary dots, I will continue to share the little bits and pieces I see (or feel). This is, after all, my diary, no? :-)

You know, even when I don't make an effort to drop by doesn't mean that I've forgotten you all... I have got a lot of love to share. But funny how when we actually meet, we don't talk to one another like how we write to each other.

=) peace