domesticatedness?

I went grocery shopping today, came home and cooked sliced beef wanton noodles accompanied with wanton soup. Then I took abt 3 hours scrubbing the kitchen cos I had the urge to clean and disinfect. The kitchen is now bright and white! And I have a backache now :-( I really need to start exercising regularly again. That is my boring day.

I'm in bed wit a backache now and craving for chocs. I had a bar of snickers that I ate half and forgot to keep it in the fridge. When I wanted to eat it just now, it had ants!!! I know it's sad. It was the only chocolate available in the house and I was desperate and still am desperate. I threw it away of course. That is all that happened in my boring day. After the exams, I feel clueless... it's my term break anyway. Will be starting my new term next week! Human anatomy and physiology, cell and molecular biology and pharmaceutical chemistry modules this coming term.

I'm not even sure if domesticatedness is a word...

Summertime... and the loving is easy?!!

How long ago has it been since I blogged? Pretty long. Nothing much has happened during that long study period. Warm, humid, city Singapore air is not polluted but it is bad enough for me. Oh how I miss the crisp cool air of spring... or even that of autumn's. :-( Being in the tropics isn't that all fun and sunny. Trust me, the sun and the humidity is intolerable. Excuse me for being prissy. Ahaha...

I don't know how thick is the ozone layer above this region but one thing evident is the pigmentation that I'm getting on my shoulders, arms and legs. Not to mention the face... I don't get 'cute pigmentation' in the form of freckles. I'm not that fair as in caucasian-fair and not as 'yellow' as the chinese so I'm more reddish (though pinkish would make me sound adorable). Anyway, these little pigmentations will grow big and brown as I get older but to slab on the sunscreen on my body in this humid weather, I'll be greasy by the time I step out of the house, oil-free or not!

I wonder how the weather will affect my future. Will I remain in this tropical region or will I migrate somewhere nice? Europe is a nice place but I can't figure out where exactly yet. I prefer Italy to France though. I doubt I'd stay in Moscow although I still dream of Russia. It's way too tough there. Then again, maybe NZ or Australia... except that these countries have been flocked by asians already. Oh well, I'm still a healthy 22 going on 23 and have yet to earn a proper paycheck. We'll see about that later. Just need to explore more excuses to travel.

P/S: When I say I get pigmentations, they're like teeny-weeny reddish-brown dots on my arms and shoulder, and the face. But it's not as though I'm covered by red ants or something. I'm not that blotchy yet! Ahaha... Vanity.

atisha!-atisha! we all fall down...

Have I mentioned that I absolutely love nursery rhymes? Whoever Mother Goose was, I wish I'm in that soothingly rocking cradle... even if it's on the treetop, or on the cow that jumped over the moon. I guess I'm in that phase when reality actually hit smack centre on my wide forehead (which can actually mean I've a larger surface area of grey matter = more info storing cells = pandai) Ok, back to reality... science is a big interest of my life... and so are many things. But to juggle it all... I always get hit on the head by the one I fail to catch. I don't even know what I'm talking about except that everything is metaphorical and scientific.

I'm pretty sure I want a career in science cos that's what I can imagine dedicating my time to. Although I like cooking, I've never considered that as a career. So, I'm pursuing science... and it's interesting... but science in theory can be the worst thing ever cos how do u put it into words... I mean phrase it all in English?! How do u actually write an essay on mechanisms that only takes a few equations to explain? See, I haven't actually reached that stage of 'reporting'. I like English but when u have to translate science into English, it's absolutely horrific to me.

Comes to the point that if I were to pursue a career in science, this is what I'd actually have to do. Ok, it's not that bad compared to doing accounts or something. So yes... it is making me braindead. I don't even know if it's just me or the whole thing sucks. I can safely say that I'm not an 'under-average' student. Maybe I'm just sorta complacent. Or maybe I just want my bad cough to disappear. Maybe the coffee I just made is too diluted...

Oh well... let's not think about work at the moment. I miss freedom. Of the mind, I meant. At the moment, I can't of anything but work work work. Is it just this country or what? Although there aren't only S'poreans in my class, it seems like everyone seems all out to kick each others' asses, S'porean or not. Maybe my course is demanding in a way. Using both sides of the brain, scientific and not.

I miss running around in spring, basking in sunlight. Here, I dread the sun so much. It's scorching hot and it makes u feel yucky and sticky and icky and it's pigmenting my fair skin. :-P Ahaha... I swear my forehead is like the darkest part of my body. ~_^ Ok, it doesn't look as bad as it sounds though. I just wanna blog (rant) and not go back to my research. I just wanna hold on to times when ur only worry is not getting that pair of shoe ur size, or even when scraped knees were the painfullest ever. Lucky for me, I have the most understanding and loving guy loving me blindly. He would bring me coffee and bagels for breakfast on his way to school. I guess this is it for now.

P/S Nina: Nice dress
P/S Fade: Ur combination is really a greek salad!
P/S myself: How do I post a pic? Ahaha... Complete ur damn essays then think abt other stuff!

Seriously, I have to be strict with myself sometimes...

How do I begin... to tell the story of how great a love can be?

I am on the verge of insanity. I'm so so tired these days cos I'm so busy yet my school work is piling up. Well, the work might just be 2 essays but the research I gotta do... Oh mine god. I'm almost getting cross-eyed from all the reading I've done. And my PC's gonna go for repair tomorrow and man oh man... I'm gonna have a ball of a time hand writing 2 experimental reports and 2 freaking essays. Have I mentioned the ease of surfing for resources online is gonna be striked out too? Well, I like hand writing stuff and I love books... even the smell of 'em but when reports are breathing down ur neck, it is highly nerve-wrecking. Please don't say that I'm doing my work last minute which is why I'm freaking out. I've been doing the research the past wk already and I have barely 2 weeks for each and when they all have the same dateline, meaning 4 different researches for 4 different reports... ok, I'm regurgitating my words. Anyway, I've got a few days left. Wish me luck.

I still love science.

(mumble mumble)

I woke up with a throat so sore I couldn't speak. Even swallowing my saliva hurts. I'm muted today. Once again, I've another report due (which I have almost every week) so busy-busy. I'm now eating semolina milk pudding which I made last night. Its coolness and smoothness is so soothing to my throat but I'm currently craving for real food, although it's gonna be a torture to eat. Anyway, S'pore hasn't been hit by the bird flu but they have begun culling the chickens due to a 'preventive measure'. How cruel is that?! Well, of course it shows that they prioritise the people's health before economic benefits. Then again, I guess they're showing off to the WHO. Singapore is such a kiasu country. Did u know that we have the first driverless commuter trains to run? I wonder how much losses they are actually making due to the manpower and computers to manage the train (although they have done away with drivers). Oh no... my econs is haunting me obviously. Ok, it's a long-run thingy.

Speaking of which, remember Stalin had those '5-yr plans' and '10-yr plans'? The 7 Stalinist gothic buildings were built on these plans. They stand wonderfully haunting in the skies. It really is hauntingly beautiful although that castle in Prague would beat it hands down. Beauty oh beauty, where for art thou? Certainly not where I am, if ye haft not already known. Ok, I'm not a literary loving person, not arty-farty. I'm more like uhmm... ok, shan't waste ur time. I can't think of anything to describe myself except that I'm kinda mute at the moment. Hope to be return with a bang ;-)

PS: I didn't even do literature at my GCE 'O' levels.

Yawn

I am so tired today. I didn't even do anything remotely tiring! On my way to class today, I had to go through a horribly selfish society of train commuters. The passengers didn't wait for others to alight but just rushed in. I had to wait for 2 trains before I could squeeze in. I bet anyone could get away with molesting in the train. It's really tiring and disheartening having all these ungracious people around u. I was worrying for 2 ladies who wanted to squeeze in but they couldn't and they just stood at the door! Talk abt being stupid. I was commenting to my bf then tt those girls are gonna get themselves snapped! This is the Singapore MRT for u, no matter how frequent the train comes.

There are abt 4 million ppl in this tiny island and they are expecting up to 6 million in the future! Can u imagine that? We are already living on top of each other and inconsiderate people gets on ur nerves. With 6 million people, the probability of bumping into more ungracious, inconsiderate people is absolutely maddeningly higher. As it is, we pay half a million dollars (S'pore) for a tiny house with 3 bedrooms, 1 study and a hall. I think in the future, we'll have to pay that much to live in a hell hole. Maybe I should move back to M'sia. ~_^

Then again, not. At least not for now. When the society there are obviously liberated, I might consider. Anyway, back to me. I had clam chowder for dinner and after that, I had 2 naans with peas! The night is still young and I'm already batting my eyelids at my PC. I better try to get as much rest as I can so I will not fall asleep in tomorrow's econs lecture. It's complete torture.

To Fade, I'll talk abt my science interest soon.
To Nina, I wonder if u ever get tired of ur ever-interesting life.

Spakoini nochi.

The Sound of Music

My interest in music has not wavered since I started paying decent attention to it. It's all abt the emotions emanating from the very "song" itself. What genre am I talking abt?

CLASSICAL - the beautiful melodies and powerful voice of the tenor... u can picture a scene with every tune of it...
Likes Tchaikovsky's Swan Lake, Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata and Pathetique, Mendelssohn, Mozart, Vivaldi, Strauss, Puccini's Nessun Dorma, etc.

ROCK - mainly classic rock with the original blues elements... and some hair metal rock... and also, "gothic" melodic.
Likes Led Zepp, Uriah Heep, CCR, Blue Oyster Cult, ACDC, KISS, Deep Purple, Bob Seger, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Pink Floyd, ZZ Top, REO Speedwagon, Cream, MSG, Whitesnake, Dream Theatre, Def Leppard, Marilyn Manson(old albums), Cradle of Filth, Rob Zombie, etc.

BLUES and some JAZZ. New Orlean's Jazz where blues became as it is and that cabaret jazz, mmm...

(CLASSICS) - some really really old songs way back from the '40s... like Tony Bennett, Frank Sinatra, Ella Fitzgerald, Astrud Gliberto, Andy Williams, etc.

Now u get the gist of my 'blaring' music.

When I was 4y/o, I was already thrown into Yamaha for those electone courses. Then I learnt the piano till grade 3 and the organ till grade 9. Of course including the sucky theory. I really hated it then... only after I managed to quit, did I regret doing so. Apart from that, my dad taught me how to play the violin which I so sucked at. I got a cousin to teach me the guitar once a while and after I can play it, I'll forget it a week later *bummer! Then again, anyone with a musical background can pluck out tunes... slowly... yes... slowly. I joined the band during the first 3 mths in college just to "master" the flute. I think I may have forgotten the fingerings... I'm not sure. Oh well... I occasionally play the piano now. Errm... I only play classical. Most of the scores I have are sonatas. And yes, my almost 20y/o Petrof may not be out of tune yet but it desperately needs servicing and polishing. I would love a baby grand though despite my lagging left hand! Such materials...

Saturated

Monounsaturated, polyunsaturated or good old saturated butter? As u can see, my brain is over-saturated that I cannot even think straight at the moment. I've finally completed my lab report that required me to do so much reading I feel numb at the moment. This is horrible. At times like this, when I was back in Moscow, I'd be playing tavli (backgammon) with my greek friends over and over, over a glass (sometimes a couple) of frappe.

I don't read mags at all. They make me feel cheap, ugly and fat. How disgusting is that? Although I did subscribe to Discover but it burnt a hole in my pocket...

This brings me to another point. No one seem to put my looks to a race. In Russia, some thought I was Russian, Japanese, Thai, Chinese or Vietnamese. Back at home, no one can really tell what I am. Well, my ID card states Malay cos ur race follows ur dad's race and since my dad's followed my granddad's... I'm Malay. Whatever happened to the women?! So if my paternal great-grandmom is Dutch, maternal grandmom is Chinese-Javanese and maternal granddad is Javanese, does that make me, Malay/Javanese/Dutch/Chinese? What's all these racial classification anyway? It sucks. Everytime someone asks me what I am (referring to my race), I say, a citizen of the world.

Busy-ness a disease?

Thank god I don't have this disease though at times like this, when reports and assignments are due, I wish I had that disease... I guess I'm too lazy. At the moment, I'm rushing for my lab report on some microbiology experiments. I guess I'll be busy busy (and u ask, whatta hell am I doing here?!). Oh well... just in case u'd wonder what I'll be up to, in the next few days. Studies are starting to creep up on me. I've been sitting on my laurels too much. Not that I'm doing badly or something... but I just find myself incapable of studying economics! My microbiology and chemistry modules are going smoothly and I just lurrrve science. ;-) Econs is driving me mad though. Nothing registers in my head class after class :-S That's right. I'm stupidoto when it comes to management. Be it my time management or my management modules. Ok, my boiling hot coffee has cooled down now. Don't miss me.

Moscow water park collapses

It's really a wondrous country... Russia. As they say, great things come to an end. However, this is a country that never quits... with the babushkas selling all they can from kittens to lemons from their summer farm, just to make ends meet. It breaks my heart so, seeing all these grumpy tiny old women so independent yet willing to pour their hearts out, when prompted. The promise of the communist regime, that every man will be taken care of, worked for these people and how they suffer now, because they never really exercised laissez faire in supporting themselves.

Anyway, Russia is one country that really inspires and amazes me. It really isn't the 'backward-drunken-communist' country that many think. It is the biggest country after all and of course, the government is deemed corrupted. Still, I believe they have the motherland's interest at heart. There isn't any Russian who isn't proud to be one. They went through a lot to be what they are now, cultivating a unique culture.

How many Stalinist-gothic buildings have put u in awe? And the domes of the cathedrals glimmering gold (which is actually copper I believe), and the unique structure of each kremlin... the Byzantine frescoes covering the walls up to the ceiling. It's really amazing, this country pious at heart, suffering at state, and notorious in its image. How many times have we been told not to judge a book by its cover? Look beyond the 'outlook' and u'll really see what's beautiful. Ya lyublyu Rossiya!

My condolences to the families of victims of crashes, bombings, collapses and any other mishaps that's not meant to be. It could've been me.

First time...

Reminds me when I first had to do lab reports... or the first time being in a foreign country all alone. Then again, how many 'first times' do we keep close to our hearts? Definitely not this first blog. It's pretty insignificant, me thinks. Anyway, be prepared to read incoherent ramblings and inconsistent incantations. I'm no writer and I guess the only reason why I'm in this is because I feel the urge to torture others reading my 'blogs'. Nah, I'm kidding... really.

Anyway, it was vee day today and while I was out nearby, I'm glad I didn't see excited skinny girls with flowers and balloons brimming with joy and miserable looking i'm-macho guys who thought they scored a 100 points today. No, I'm really not sore about lovey-dovey-kissy-dizzy couples. Maybe I see Valentine's as an establishment, out to set the lonely hearts on fire and the loved-ly hearts on desire. I'm not done. Well, yes, the 'market' benefits from extorting the poor boys buying overpriced chocs and flowers and dinners. As for the girls... hmmm... probably, they don't have much to lose unless they're still deflowered before dinner. What else? Couples in love get to 'be in love' on vee day and quarreling couples get to be nice to each other? There's still much more I can criticize but to each his own. I'd rather donate the money to charity than to spend more money on chocs just because they come in pretty pink and gold boxes. Oh well, that's me for u today, the first time. I am (happily) attached by the way.

Note: It's not like I'm drunk or under the effect of other substances. It's 0300h and I just watched WWE. How disgusting is that?